Well, I have overcome some stuff with this new life thing.  I have ventured into the world of exercise...all kinds.  I have of course walked/run.  On Monday, I went to Zumba... alone!  Just me in a class full of skinny bitches with moves like Jagger... or more like Ricky Martin.  OMG!  I felt like such an idiot.  But I got through the class.  If I couldn't do, I just marched in place and moved my arms.  It was crazy! I also figured out that I have NO stomach muscles.  The leader was like "Tighten those stomach muscles!" and I really tried. Nothing happened.  My fat rolls just rubbed together and I couldn't make it work like the other ladies. BUT, I was still standing at the end and that my friends is a miracle.  I like this rec center.  It's not the one closest but it's got more to offer and I feel comfortable there.
So, while I was there I met the yoga instructor and she was so nice and swore that I would love her class so tonight I went to my first yoga class.  I LOVED IT!!  Granted it was a stretching and relaxation class and not strength, but still it was so relaxing and I felt so limber.  I really enjoyed it. My good friend Marci came with me.  Then we had a beer, but I digress... lol.  I'm going to the strength class on Monday and see if I still love it after that!
So, I have been trying to figure out, why now? Why is this suddenly working for me?  Where is this willpower coming from? I have a couple of answers. The obvious answer first is from God.  He knows my struggles and He has put some things and some people in my path that have helped me. He lead me to the Anti-Jared blog and facebook guy who encourages me daily in his posts.  He has surrounded me with friends who encourage me daily for every little victory even, and especially when I don't feel so victorious.  Chris being gone has also really helped.  Whenever we have tried to lose weight together, it never fails that Chris loses like 10lbs the first day and I gain 2lbs and I start off discouraged and quit.  So, having him not kick my ass on the scale has helped.
The last and most psychobabble thing I think has helped me gain control of my health is that I have absolutely no control over anything else.  To be honest, the rest of my life is pretty shitty these days and there is nothing I can do about it.  I can't control a damn thing. I CAN control what I put in my mouth and what I do with my body... so I am seizing the opportunity.  Whatever is allowing me to do this... I'll TAKE IT!
I feel really good about what I am doing and how I am doing it.  I am learning about my body and what it can do.  I am much stronger than I ever thought I was.  I will be successful this time.  Yay me!

Leave a Reply.